Thirst. If you haven’t noticed it’s at al all time high these days. It’s more prevalent among men but women aren’t immune either. It affects your family, it affects your friends, it affects your neighbors, it affects your coworkers and chances are you have encountered it too.

Sadly there is no cure for thirst nor is there any way to contain it, (maybe interventions but do those ever work?) but there are warning signs so you can tell if you or someone you know is being thirsty.


1. When attractiveness is based solely on how certain body parts appear while ignoring all other aspects of a person’s appearance, personality, intelligence or living status (Example: men who think a woman is “bad” just because she has a big ass but overlook her busted face, the fact that she has 8 kids, can’t put together a coherent sentence for shit and has no place to live).

2. When a person sends unsolicited naked pictures of themselves to someone they are interested in but refuse to hold more than a 5 minute conversation about anything (Hint: if a person didn’t ask to see naked pictures that means they don’t want them)

3. People who think it’s perfectly acceptable to drive around with their friends, honk at someone and then proceed to circle around the block so they can catch up to the person to talk to them (Don’t do this. It’s stalkerish an pathetic as hell if you’re not the one driving the car)

4. People who are older than 16 and still talk about people they don’t know regardless of their celebrity status and refer to them as their “future husband” or “future wife”.

5. People who collect pictures of other people just to have them (Anyone who does this gets a :: serious stare :: from me)

6. People who intentionally go after unattractive people and tell them they are great because it assures they will never get rejected (Can people please stop doing this. What’s wrong with the truth?)

7. People who swear they are popular but only use their Twitter or Facebook pages to follow people who never ever reply to them

8. People who beg for company at inopportune times and after getting turned down don’t understand why it’s a bad time even after the situation was explained to them

9. When people take 48586249103 pictures of themselves and post them online under self-deprecating captions in the hopes that someone else will tell them otherwise (Yes people who do this are ugly/fat/whatever and the people who entertain that attention whoring are just as thirsty)

10. People who approach others and ask them not only for their phone number but the street they live on, where they work, the whereabouts their significant other is (regardless if they have one or not) and their Facebook and Twitter pages